The Affair of the Curiously Heavy Trunk
by Apo
Summary: One of the affairs mentioned in Ptolemy's Gate. Pg. 35 Footnote. Disclaimer: I don't own the Bartimaeus Trilogy. Please read and review!


The Affair of the Curiously Heavy Trunk

(This is one of the Affairs mentioned in Ptolemy's Gate. Pg. 35, footnote)

Rupert Devereaux called up John Mandrake.

"We have a problem, Mandrake. I need you to get on it right away. Summon your best demon and come to this address immediately." Devereaux gave Mandrake coordinates and hung up.

Mandrake thought and thought. There was no demon that popped into his mind. Then it became clear as day. Bartimaeus was an obvious choice. This was probably a little thing, so he decided to summon Bartmaeus.

-- -- -- --

I was floating around in the Other Place when I felt the sharp pierces f hooks that were summoning me. I wanted to scare the magician summoning me, but chances were it was Mandrake. He's the only one that had gone through the trouble of summoning me. So I used the guise of Ptolemy. When I appeared in a poof of smoke, I was not disappointed. It was Mandrake.

"Is there a reason for this summoning or is this purely a social visit?" I asked.

"Devereaux called me up. There's somewhat of a problem. He told me to summon up a strong demon," he explained.

"So I was the obvious choice, right? I'm flattered," I told the boy.

"Don't be. There were plenty of other choices."

"Yes, I'm sure there were," I goaded. Chances were he might get so caught up in his little argument with me that he might forget about his so-called mission, and Devereaux would be mad and demote him. No such luck.

"I have no time to waste. Meet me at these coordinates," Mandrake promptly replied. He handed me a piece of paper.

"Race you!" I said and disappeared in a poof of smoke. When I arrived at the coordinated, I waited for Mandrake. He arrived in his car. I could stay 3 years on Earth and still move faster than that thing. Mandrake walked up the stairs and signaled for me to follow.

"What's the problem, sir?" He addressed Devereaux.

"I have this curiously heavy trunk! I just can't move it. Tell your demon to move it. I want to move it to my office," Devereaux said. He was on the brink of sobbing. Pathetic little man. "I called Jane, but she said she had more "important" things! What's more important than this?"

"Plenty," I heard Mandrake mutter. "Bartimaeus, move this trunk!"

The trunk was ancient. It smelled rather old. I didn't see why the trunk was so "heavy." So I lifted it and was moving it toward the door when Devereaux shouted "Careful! I love that trunk." I dropped it, and needless to say, it slammed through the floor an inch from Mandrake's foot. His shoelace caught onto something, who am I kidding, the trunk was so old, a dust bunny probably bit it, anyway, he went down with the trunk through the floor of Devereaux's mansion and would've plummeted to his death if I didn't save him. Good old me.

-- -- -- --

Mandrake was flying; well he was in the air. Bartimaeus had dropped the trunk and something had caught and Mandrake was dangling in the air.

"Hang on, Mandrake," Bartimaeus shouted down.

Mandrake swore. "Hurry up, Bartimaeus, this is rather awkward."

Slowly Mandrake lifted up and landed on solid ground again. He stood up and fell again. He was rather dizzy.

"Looks like you're going up again!" Bartimaeus gleefully exclaimed.

Someone opened the door and Bartimaeus set Mandrake down on the seat.

-- -- -- --

After I had set Nathaniel down, I procceded to levitate the trunk toward the trunk… of the car. I was about to gingerly set the trunk down when Devereaux once again shouted something. It was indiscernible, but it made me drop the trunk, therefore making the car a sort of seesaw. The car went flying, with Mandrake in it. Once again, Mandrake's life would have been extinguished if it weren't for me. If you need it spelled out, I saved him again.

-- -- -- --

Mandrake spun and landed on his back floating in air. Well he wasn't, the car was. When he got out he would thank Bartimaeus by dismissing him. Bartimaeus gingerly set the car down. Nathaniel once again owed Bartmaeus his life. He wasn't going to show it though. When he got out he walked straight to the sidewalk and ordered a new car.

"You're welcome, Mandrake. Oh really? That's the second time I've saved your life in the same hour? Wow, I really astonish myself…" Bartimaeus chattered on. Mandrake ignored him. He knew he should thank him, but he still hadn't got over the Ambassador's Wife mission. When the new car pulled up, Mandrake waited until Bartimaeus had put the trunk in before he got in himself.

"I think I'll travel with you in case you almost die again. This was a fairly simple mission and you've almost died twice. You know what they say, third time's the charm, and normally that's good, but you don't want that happening to you now do you? And you don't seem to be able to save yourself so I have to save you," Bartimaeus explained.

"If you wish," was Mandrake's only reply.

-- -- -- --

The nerve of this boy! I save his life and I'm willing to save his hide once more and his reply, If you wish? Well, he really needs to stop summoning me then. I was mad at the boy, but I had to save him if he died once more, seeing as I was bound by a little circle called a pentacle. So his driver was driving and he obeyed the laws, traffic lights, etc. the usual. I almost left, as they were going so slow. They reached a light and the driver braked so suddenly that all the cars behind them slammed into the car and including the trunk's force, they were propelled forward. I had prepared the car for this so the trunk wouldn't slam through the trunk of the car. But not if the trunk hit it and propelled it forward. Confusing. Well, I admit, they were going fast but not fast enough to elude Bartimaeus of Uruk, Sakhr Al-Jinni of Al-Alrish, N'Gorso The Mighty, and the Serpent Of Silver Plumes of The Iroquois! I have spoken with Solomon and Ptolemy, and rebuilt the walls of Uruk, Karnak and Praugue! Anyway, they weren't fast enough for me, and I got them in time. I delivered them safely to

Devereaux's office. My job was done.

-- -- -- --

Mandrake said the proper spell and Bartimaeus swirled off to the Other Place. Mandrake decided to name this affair The Affair of the Curiously Heavy Trunk. He walked off smiling.

-- -- -- --

As I swirled off to the peace of the Other Place, I decided I would name this affair The Affair of the Curiously Heavy Trunk. My job was done.


End file.
